The Power of Choice

“Never give up, never surrender!” ---Commander Peter Taggart (lead character in “Galaxy Quest”)

Whenever I’m feeling down, I love to put up my feet and sink my mind into an old favorite movie. The reason is obvious. A good story, whether silly or profound, lifts us out of our ordinary life and into a new perspective. And within each story is a kernel of truth that some reader (or viewer) takes to heart. Perhaps that is the essential ingredient we strive to discover in each of our own stories. That kernel of truth. This is what sets each story apart. For me, this new week, I’m quoting one of my favorite fictional heroes. And I want to urge each of us to Never Give Up, NEVER Surrender!

“Part of the issue of achievement is to be able to set realistic goals, but that's one of the hardest things to do because you don't always know exactly where you're going, and you shouldn't.” ~~ George Lucas

Ah yes, the challenge of balancing the need for realistic goals and the reality that because each story is an independent creation there are quirks and inevitable diversions. Not to mention the unavoidable distractions that daily living often presents. Like John Lennon said, “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.”

We writers also face another challenge in our careers:

“You have to put in many, many, many tiny efforts that nobody sees or appreciates before you achieve anything worthwhile.” --Brian Tracy

Time. Yikes. So many little revisions, hours spent on research or even just staring into space while searching for the exact right word. How many here have sweated over picking the Perfect Name for a character?

Obviously, these precious moments invested are worthwhile. We love being writers, which is why we write. Yet too often we spend just as much time chiding ourselves over the hours wasted or bemoaning the lack of substantial feedback. We all have end goals in sight. A beginning writer hopes to get a positive response from a query. A published writer yearns for a stellar review. A multi-published author strives to reach a particular sales level. And it’s almost certain that every writer will judge herself at each stage, certain that she SHOULD be doing better.

“Success means doing the best we can with what we have. Success is the doing, not the getting; in the trying, not the triumph. Success is a personal standard, reaching for the highest that is in us, becoming all that we can be.” --Zig Ziglar

Let us remember, and remind each other as often as we can, that while we should damn well strive to reach whatever far-reaching goal we set our hearts on, We Are Successful. Reaching for the highest, becoming all we can be… That is the best goal we can hope for. Would we sneer at our best friend for her efforts, or judge her for not reaching her goals quickly enough? Of course not! We’d point out that the strongest trees grow slowly, sinking roots deep into the ground. A spindly sapling that shoots up too quickly might snap in a heavy wind.

“Trust, have faith, and keep doing the work,” we’d murmur with an encouraging smile. Part of the process of staying motivated is keeping your spirits high! As the marathon runners stumble past, the onlookers cheer and shout their support. Imagine if they offered up the kind of words we’ve been known to toss at ourselves when no one is listening. We’ve all done it. My personal favorite is to shout, “I’m a hack! My writing sucks!” while pacing around the room. *rolls eyes* Not very best-friendish, eh?

“Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." - Oscar Wilde

The truth is, everyone must strive to reach heights that are unfamiliar. We need to keep in mind that even those blessed writers who do get published immediately have issues or personal struggles of their own. We all share the need to better ourselves, to reach our personal heights, to become the Best We Can Be.

Part of what makes the difference with writing is perspective. The more we put the pressure on, the more it seems like WORK (the dreaded four letter word) and less like PLAY. Yet this is what we want more than anything, right? We’re not digging ditches or scrubbing toilets. This is our life’s dream, our greatest joy. Sometimes I find that my whole attitude shifts when I make a few changes in perspective. Rather than saying “I HAVE to finish this book” or “I have to meet this deadline,” how about “I get to finish my book!” “I get to meet a deadline!”

Wow! How lucky am I? *grin*

“The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work." --Richard Bach.

And when you get right down to it, there’s nothing you HAVE to do. Really. Everything is a choice. Even breathing. Sure, the alternative is I’d suffocate *cough* but again, it’s what I choose to do. Sometimes we Choose to take on obligations. It’s easy then to believe we HAVE TO do this or that. But the simple truth is, we Choose. Each and every time. To be responsible. To be kind. To be mature (sometimes *wink*). To write our books.

So let’s make that choice and recognize the beauty and absolute pleasure it is to Have that choice. YAY! We Are WRITERS!

My choice this week is to…

Continue on with first draft of suspense. I'm so close to the end I can taste it!

Weekly essay.

How about you?

Have a fabulous week, everyone!! Go-go-GO!!

Smiles,
Chiron O'Keefe

Also featured at Pop Culture Divas and Between the Lines.

Dig Deep to Find Your Own Vein of Gold

"The greatest explorer on this earth never takes voyages as long as those of the man who descends to the depth of his heart." ~Julien Green

As I sifted through the comments and suggestions offered up my editor the last few months, one truth stood out. Learning to write is a lifelong process. The reason is two-fold. First is simple common sense. Just as muscles are trained to respond in sports (this is called 'muscle memory') and musicians train fingers and ears to automatically pick out the right notes, so does each writer develop a sense of how to write with clarity and skill.

This part is arduous mostly because in the beginning our eyes pass over mistakes which after a book or two become glaringly obvious. Writers need thick-skins right from the start as we discover our 'perfect prose' is not a marble sculpture but clay that needs to be shaped and molded repeatedly until our masterpiece is complete.

The second reason writing is a lifelong process of learning is much more intriguing.

Writing is a Path of Self-Discovery. Both a craft and an art. We learn to rework the words and clarify our intent with our minds. We learn to create a story with our hearts and our souls.

"The man who views the world at fifty the same as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life." ~Muhammad Ali

The first time a critique partner wrote: this isn't clear to me, I had to dig deeper. Again, back to the first step—how to clarify our intent. One tip for beginning writers I can offer is from my own experience. An author may know what the story is but the reader doesn't. We must ground the reader in our setting.

Staring at the computer monitor, the writer perched in her padded desk chair. On the wood bookcase beside her desk, the antique Victorian clock ticked off the seconds. The last remnants of cold tea in her cup, she pecked away at the keyboard, occasionally glancing out the window as sunshine warmed her front yard.

Next we must remember that while the action seems obvious to us, we truly do need to spell it out for our readers. The author knows the character's motivation and where the story is going. Because of this, we may unintentionally leave bits out because our brain has filled in the blanks. Our reader doesn't have the same crib notes, so while at first it will feel as if we're spelling out the obvious the scenes will flow much more smoothly.

Yet 'digging deeper' is not just about setting, description and action. We must take risks. We must bare our soul. We must surprise ourselves if we hope to surprise others.

"No one remains quite what he was when he recognizes himself." -Thomas Mann

"Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death." ~Anaïs Nin

There are writers who compose stories without ever feeling they've 'discovered' anything new, in themselves or in their writing. There are songwriters who can whip out catchy little tunes without much reflection as well. Then there's John Lennon, a composer who dug deep into his soul and searched his heart for truth. His journey is reflected in his music, and these songs still strike chords within our hearts today. Since this week's theme is about 'digging deep', it's time to reflect on which story you wish to write. In my view, the choice is based on the stories you most enjoy reading.

I just finished a lovely book by Linda LaRoque, titled, My Heart Will Find Yours. At the end, I sighed with satisfaction and said, "Now that's a love story." Why? Because the characters I grew to love touched my heart, and their journey towards love, healing and self-awareness became my journey as well.

My own upcoming release, Sidekicks, features a wanna-be 'leading lady' who believes the only way to rise above her current stature (feeling like an extra in her own movie) is to snag the ultimate leading man. While I wrote the story, I had to walk in her footsteps and dig deep to understand her world. Her quest had to resonate within my own heart in order to pen a tale that would click with my readers.

"When you re-read a classic you do not see in the book more than you did before. You see more in you than there was before." ~Clifton Fadiman

Many a writer struggles with squeezing in precious minutes to write or struggles with fear disguised as procrastination. Ironically, though the process of digging deep may seem to require the perfect setting, the endless hours or a complete lack of fear, the opposite is true. Often times we pull away because, truth be told, writing is a heck of a lot of work. It's much easier to watch television shows that a friend of mine fondly described as "chewing gum for the mind" or play card games on the computer. Shut-up! I have to win at least ONE game before I write!! *grin*

Those writers we envy, the ones who whip out an impossible number of pages regularly (Allison Brennan, I'm talking to YOU!), do so because they're pumped about their story. They're excited because digging deep is sparking something within them. The enthusiasm carries over in their work.

So what to do when you only have an hour a day? Write. Allison did just that, carving out time between raising a family and working full-time (she's since given up her day job). She's now a NY Times best-selling author. She dug deep not only to find the stories but to find the perseverance and determination to make her dream come true.

"To the question of your life you are the answer, and to the problems of your life you are the solution." ~Joe Cordare

As I wrap up this essay, my intention to explore this topic led to some unexpected realizations. Digging deep is about reaching down into our souls to create stories and much more. Pushing ourselves to write when we only have a few moments and persevering through the endless rewrites (those veins of gold are rarely visible with one strike of the pick-axe) or tossing out hopeful queries is perhaps the most vital quest of all. Self-discovery is much more than a sparkling epiphany. Self-discovery is finding out who you are and exactly what you can accomplish. Today, an essay. Perhaps tomorrow, the world!

"Many people miss opportunity because it came disguised in overalls." - Henry Ford

Speaking of self-discovery… one book that I felt 'changed my life' is Demian by Herman Hesse. Yet over the years I've found that even the silliest of movies (Groundhog Day comes to mind) can trigger new understanding. What do you consider to be an avenue of self-discovery? Then there are the qualities developed as a result of becoming a writer. The big one for me is perseverance. How about you?

"Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something and that this thing must be attained." --Marie Curie

Here's to a productive and inspired week. We shall persevere because We Are Writers. *grin* What do writers do? We write! Let's get to it. Go-go-GO!

Smiles,
Chiron O'Keefe

Also featured at Pop Culture Divas and Between The Lines.

All You Need Is Love

Nothing you can do that can’t be done.
Nothing you can sing that can’t be sung.
Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be you in time.
It’s easy…
All You Need Is Love.

–John Lennon

Being a writer requires us to incorporate many character traits. Persistence, patience, enthusiasm, and dedication are just a few. Rarely though, do we consider one of the most vital of all qualities.

Love.

As I’m writing this in the light of the most romantic of holidays, Valentine’s Day, what better time to explore this most elusive and yet vulnerable quality of being?

For many a romance writer, love is the stuff dreams are made of. Deep down most people yearn for a happily-ever-after, and heartfelt stories satisfy that craving. So how does this apply to writers and even people in general?

Love is the most essential quality of life. Whether it’s applied to our tastes (I love grapes) or yearnings (I love to travel), love is part of our everyday world. Yet often we push ourselves so much we’re barely getting by. Commitments, responsibilities, obligations, and worries, all suck up our precious moments and challenge our ability to maintain a semblance of balance. For writers, there’s deadlines and queries, edits and of course, the dreaded synopsis, all necessary aspects of our career which can leave us wrung out and feeling more despair than hope.

The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread. --Mother Teresa

For couples, it’s natural to utilize counseling and for parents, endless advice exists on how to maintain a loving bond. However each of us needs a solid relationship with the person we must live with every day of our lives—Our Self.

"You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." –Buddha

It’s so easy to encourage others, to offer up words of cheer and support, yet when we look in the mirror, we avert our eyes. We may grumble about our bodies or compare ourselves unfavorably to others. We bemoan every miniscule error and seize each mistake as proof of our general unworthiness. The real question here is, would we do this to a friend? For most of us the answer is a resounding No! Of course, we wouldn’t. Which leads to this question, when we did stop being our own best friend?

It's me who is my enemy

Me who beats me up

Me who makes the monsters

Me who strips my confidence.

~Paula Cole, "Me," This Fire

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” –Lucille Ball

Here’s an exercise I encourage everyone to try. Go to a mirror and say the three magic words. I Love You. Say it and mean it! Gaze into your eyes and connect with your soul. Some may feel an initial resistance. The self-criticisms that have for years fallen automatically from our lips might crowd in. Be patient with your heart. For many of us, the lonely vessel has taken a beating over the years. Focus on YOU and say it again.

I Love You.

There’s a special rush of exhilaration as the words sink in. Sometimes even tears well up. Let them. This is your precious moment with your true self. The first step. Take a moment to thank your wonderful legs for walking and those incredible arms for lifting and carrying. *smile* Now, one uncomfortable moment arises when those self-criticisms intrude, spitefully pointing out all the mistakes we inevitably make. Here’s the next step. Focus on your reflection and say:

I Love You No Matter What. I Forgive All Your Mistakes. I Love You.

“I must learn to love the fool in me the one who feels too much, talks too much, takes too many chances, wins sometimes and loses often, lacks self-control, loves and hates, hurts and gets hurt, promises and breaks promises, laughs and cries.” –Theodore Rubin from Love me, Love My Fool, 1976

Love, love, LOVE. It makes the world go ‘round, after all. *grin* Let’s direct our affection to all the positive things we wish to embrace and wish to be.

I Love ME. I Love Being A Successful Writer. I Love Being Productive. I Love Achieving My Goals. I Love My Book!

A funny thing happens when we frame our thoughts in a network of love. A sparkly, glowing light infuses our brain. This isn’t just speculation. Research has proved that love triggers different regions in our cerebral cortex. Scans actually do “light up” and chemicals triggering euphoria are released. Love is a potent tool and by Jove, let’s utilize it.

“Birds do it, Bees do it, even Educated Fleas do it. Let’s do it, Let’s fall in love!” –Cole Porter

This week, our focus is to enrich not only our writing but our lives with the power of love. For the next seven days, let’s do our mirror exercise. We’ll reinforce our self-love activity with positive Love statements. No matter what the task, we can approach it with the spirit of love. Maybe it’s silly, *laughs* so let’s embrace silly! Let’s be giddy and goofy and exuberant. I Love to Write! I Love Me!

“What can we gain by sailing to the moon if we are not able to cross the abyss that separates us from ourselves?” –Thomas Merton, The Wisdom of the Desert, 1960

The power of love is miraculous. Inscribed on the Temple of Apollo at Delphi are these words: Know Thyself. I’m going to add: Love Thyself.

With self-love, we can accomplish anything. We can climb any mountain, overcome any obstacle. Of course, we still need persistence, patience, enthusiasm and dedication. *wink* However, when we infuse our lives with love, an amazing energy bubbles up. Where before we felt grim, now our hearts are light. The weight of despair dissipates and a new hope buoys us up.

The smile you offer to your Self in the mirror is reflected back. It becomes easier to smile at others and to feel everlasting confidence. We all need to be our own best friend.

"I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence but it comes from within. It is there all the time." --Anna Freud

My goals for the week:

I love doing edits for Sidekicks.
I love fleshing out the story and characters of my WIP.
I love doing my physical therapy exercises.
I love writing my weekly essay.
I Love Me!!

How’s about you?

Two more quotes, just because... *smile*

Happy Valentine’s Day!

“Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit.” ~Peter Ustinov

“Love must be as much a light, as it is a flame.” ~Henry David Thoreau

Smiles to you all,

Chiron O’Keefe
http://www.chironokeefe.blogspot.com/